Hate the Game, Not the Player

"Hate the Game, not the Player."

You may have heard that phrase before and I don’t condone the behavior of what in our culture would be called a “player” (referring to someone who is not faithful to a friend or romantic interest). However, I think that we could all learn something from the principle of criticizing behavior without judging the content of that person's character.

We (as Christians especially) have gotten really good at not only judging someone’s behavior, but also judging their character based on what we see in their behavior. I don’t think this is fair and, at times, I actually think it is wrong.

Someone’s character, integrity, and reputation are, in most cases, their most prized possession. When you question someone’s character, you are questioning their worth and significance. Most of the time, we don’t have enough information to judge someone’s character.

Prime Examples:
1. Politicians. We watch how they vote, scrutinize what they say, and listen to rumors about what they think and how they act. Very few of us actually KNOW the politicians that are in power. So, is it fair for us to actually judge their character? We can have opinion on their policies, decisions, and behaviors, but we can’t judge them as a person. We can’t say, “He’s a scoundrel” or “What a sellout!” That is dangerous territory. If you have ever been in a position of influence where you make decisions that impact people, you know that people (with limited information) can often times completely misunderstand the intent of your actions and methods because they don’t understand the whole story and all the factors in place. Politicians are leaders in authority who are privy to information that the general public does not have (for good reason). Judge their policy, but don’t bash or defame their character. It’s not right.

2. Professional Athletes. They make millions, play a sport for a living, and often times live crazy lifestyles off the court (at least that is what we see on the media). But, that’s not the whole person and its not EVERY athlete. It’s not their fault that they make ridiculous amounts of money. We pay for the jerseys, tickets, and souvenirs. We are the ones that turn on the TV, invite friends over, and enjoy games (giving cable companies opportunities to advertise to us). Very few people can do what a professional athlete can do and (by the very simple economic law of supply and demand) they naturally should get paid what they get paid. If the players didn’t make that much money, then franchise owners would be able to buy entire countries with their profits. For the most part, they are all kids that want to succeed and win in life. We watch them play a fierce, competitive game on TV. We don’t know them personally. So, be careful to judge the content of their character.

3. Bosses. Everyone complains about his or her boss. Well, not everyone, but a good portion of professionals have negative things to say about their boss or their superiors at work. Part of this is natural; when we are frustrated we need to blame somebody. But, I think it’s easy to take it too far. You have no idea what pressures your boss is under from THEIR superiors. Decisions they make aren’t always THEIR decisions or the way they would do things. They have a boss or superior that they are accountable to as well and that boss has more factors impacting the decision than you, your boss, or I are aware of from where we sit. Be nice to your current boss and previous bosses. They have a hard job.

Marcus Buckingham wrote this statement in his book The One Thing You Need to Know, “Find the most generous explanation for someone’s behavior and choose to believe it.” In short, believe the best! You are entitled to your opinion, your perspective on what you would do, and what you consider “right” or “wrong” behavior. Go ahead, judge behavior. But, please be careful when judging someone’s character. That is messing with someone’s soul.

Social Media and E-Everything may be the next Dot Com Bubble Burst

So, I have had a recurring thought lately about the phenomenon of social media and E-everything as it pertains to marketing and business.

Social media is great for connecting with friends, sharing information, and keeping up on what's happening in the world. I am not a social media hater.

However, there continues to be billions of dollars pumped into social media platforms with no clear path for those companies to monetize that platform. A company's power and "value" is now being determined by "eyeballs" or daily views of their platform AND the amount of personal information (email addresses) they can acquire to be sold to companies who want to market their product.

Here is what I have noticed with myself and people I know personally:

1. I don't truly "follow" everyone on my twitter account. It's a craze right now to follow everyone so that they will follow you. I think this model is broken because the more you do this, the more you begin to weed out who you actually pay attention to. So, you may have 10,000 "followers" but only 300 people actually pay attention to what you say. It's a false sense of influence. Marketers will soon learn that "followers" aren't truly followers. I think that an increasing amount of people will give up in the never ending quest of acquiring more followers and focus more on connecting with people they actually want to connect with. Every person I know is looking for ways to trim the friend list of Facebook without offending people. I don't know how Twitter and Facebook are going to actually make money. Once they start being covered in advertising, everyone will dump it. At least I will. Whoever can figure out a platform to help people connect ONLY with people they WANT to connect with will win every social media user (especially younger ones).

2. I read every piece of mail I get in my ACTUAL mailbox. I am tired of getting emails. I delete them before even reading the subject line. Even if I love the organization and what they are doing. Why? I'm not sure why, but I know it's true. Actual mail, now that's a different story. My wife makes fun of how excited I get to walk out to the mailbox, open it, grab the mail, and come inside and look through it. I catch myself listening for the mail truck to come. I realize that most companies and organizations have given up on traditional mail because of cost, but MAN, it works. I open up credit card advertisements, even when I realize what it is before I open it. It's easier to flip through, it's more tangible, and feels more personal.

3. I like reading books and magazines that are printed. I can highlight, makes notes, feel the pages, and hold the content. I think E-Books, blogs, etc. will definitely continue to climb in mass adoption, but I don't think printed books and materials will go out of style. The price of them probably needs to match what you can buy the E-version for, but any publisher who figures that out I think will lock down some serious market share.

The generation I am a part of (I'm 26) prefers genuine over glossy. We are looking for meaningful connections and real, authentic experiences. What if Social Media and E-everything is the next dot com bubble burst?

Be a Leader Worth Following (Post by Andy Stanley)

“Your talent and giftedness as a leader have the potential to take you farther than your character can sustain you. That ought to scare you. The fact that people choose to follow you is not necessarily an indicator that you deserve to be followed. There is a significant difference between having a following and being worth following. The truth is that talented, charismatic, visionary people will almost always have a following. Whether they are worth following is a different question, predicated upon a different set of values.

There is always the temptation to look at someone and judge the amount of God’s blessing upon his life based upon the number of people who have chosen to follow him. But if numbers tell the whole story, we would have to assume that God removed His blessing from Jesus toward the end of His ministry! In the weeks prior to His crucifixion the crowds began to wane. In the end there were only a handful of faithful men and women who dared to be associated with Him. Followship is not an accurate indicator of one’s worthiness to be followed.

To become a leader worth following, you must give time and attention to the inner man. To leave a legacy that goes beyond accomplishment alone, a leader must devote himself to the matters of the heart.”

-Andy Stanley, The Next Generation Leader

"This City is Yours" (Post from Mack at Elevation Church)

This City Is Yours is honestly pretty self explainitory… At Elevation Church, we – as you may have heard – are passionate about the city of Charlotte, NC. We have seen the Lord’s hand, moving us, pushing us, as a city and community, towards redemption and freedom. It’s amazing to be a part of His work.

But God doesn’t need us to accomplish His work… He’s on the move regardless of whether or not we are a part of it. The city of Charlotte is already His – He’s just allowing us to come walk by His side and see Him work.

The choruses are just a prayer for our hearts to be aligned with His – that we would hurt for the people in our lives that don’t know the goodness of His love.

One of the most exciting parts of the song to me is the bridge. When we were writing this song – at first we went for this super singable, repetitive lyric – but then we decided to take it into an entirely different direction. I wanted to use that bridge as a build of anticipation… The feeling we get when we know God is on the verge of doing something great, and we’re witnesses.

Ultimately, this song speaks to the heartbeat of Elevation Church. That people far from God will be filled with life in Christ. We just want to be a part of that vision.

-Mack

I'm impressed with George Washington

I had a conversation on Wednesday night with a friend about the amazing example of George Washington. I am not a historian and I will not pretend to be. But, what I do know about his life is pretty impressive.

George Washington chose to shield the lures of power when it was offered to him. After the revolutionary war, the newly established country of America wanted George to be KING. He declined the offer because he knew that distant generations would have the ability to corrupt the very thing he had just spent and risked his life fighting for. He stepped down from leadership and established democracy of distributed control and freedom.

Do you think you would have done the same? When fame, power, and worldwide influence are offered to you, will you do what's best for the whole and not just yourself? After all, he had "earned" it. Right?

Despite its numerous issues, America is a great country that was founded on men that saw the big picture and were humble enough to make the right decision. We should strive to be the same in the way we live our lives.

Team in Haiti

It's only our second day here, and I think it's safe to say that every single person on our team from Heartland has forever been impacted. We all agreed that whatever it was we expected...it's different...but different in a sense that it's MORE than we expected. We're more blown away by the generosity of the Haitian people. We're more humbled by how little these people have, and yet how happy they are. Above all, we're more convinced than ever how great our God is.

From our time playing with the kids, to praying with families in their homes, to cutting down brush for a new soccer field, it has all been amazing. And what a beautiful country! Our first night here, we slept out under the stars on the roof of the mission and were blessed with the most amazing view of stars and planets any of us had ever seen.

Tomorrow our plan is to pass out some of the 650 gift bags that our church packed for the local children, which I believe is going to be the icing on the cake. Pray for us, that the time would be powerful, that the children would know they are loved, and that they would hear the gospel communicated in a clear way through our translators.

-Jon McNary and the Heartland Sun Prairie Team